David Sedaris and me

I am in love with a gay man.

What is it about gay, and being gay and witty? When in history the term male homosexual transcends from a negative term queer to a more positive term gay?

The poster screams: David Sedaris Talk Pretty in Manila!

I'm not going to miss it! I promised myself. So, at 2:15 in the afternoon I went to Powerbooks, Greenbelt and lined up to get my numbered stub. The live reading started at 5pm. And I am not disappointed. His books are funny but he is even funnier in person. Though standing, Ella and I had fun. He read some parts of his book and some journal entries from 2003. He talked about his experience in Bruno's Salon and how he lost his money on a cockfight.

Book signing followed at 6pm. Oh! Long was the queue. And I couldn't help but wonder what David Sedaris would write when he sign the books. Is it going to be "Goodluck!" or is it going to be "God bless!". You know, the usual messages when you asked a celebrity for an autograph. While waiting for our turn, the host raffled some prizes. Ella's number was called. While she took her prize, the host announced another number.. 227. Hey! It was mine! We were lucky.

At 7:40, my turn has come to have my books signed. I brought three books. David asked, "What's your name?" And I said, "Pet". I even gave him a piece of paper with "Pet" written on it, just to be sure he would write "To Pet" neither "To Beth" nor "To Tet". And he said, "Oh! Another interesting name!". Then he took his little notebook from his shirt pocket. "You know, I have a list of interesting names here". Then, he jot down my name. "So, is Pet a short of …Petula?". "No", I replied. "It's Petra. I was named after my grandmother whose name is Petra and my parents shortened it to Pet". He took the first book and wrote "To Pet, I'm so happy you're alive" He took the second book while asking if I live with my parents. I said no, because they are in the province but I live with my aunt. "No yaya?", he queried. No, I answered. Then he wrote, "To Pet, no yaya I'm shocked!". "It's not too late to get a yaya!", he said as he took the last book: Me Talk Pretty One Day, which is my first Sedaris book and one of my favorites. It's old, I bought it years ago and the pages have already brown spots on some parts. He complimented the jacket. I covered the book with plastic. We continued to talked, well, he talked more than I did. I was distracted I didn't see what he wrote. I thanked him as he returned my books. On my way out, I took the last book, opened the first page.. and.. laughed. I couldn't help it. The message said: "Bawal ang umihi dito." Witty. Funny. Definitely, cool!